Nightmares and Dreams
by arispot
Summary: Jeller fluff. I'm hoping to write few chapters while they are in the hospital and once she is discharged.
1. Nightmares

Kurt let out the weight he had been holding tightly in his chest. He did not have a choice in the matter. Patterson wish she could give him a solution, a better answer or something that give them hope. Though she couldn't. Rich was witnessing the whole scene unfold, helpless as the other two. They all needed this moment away from Jane to let go so when she is back they could all pretend and so could Jane… that everything going to be okay.

Few minutes later nurse brought Jane back to her bed. Kurt wiped his tears away and wore his mask.

"Hey… how are you feeling" Kurt asked

"Better than before" Her strength was clearly fading and Kurt could hear it in her voice.

"Hey Jane" Patterson chimed in. "We are going to go back to the lab and take a look at our last data cache. Rich found few leads there before."

"Okay" Jane replied with a slight smile.

"Keep at it Ninja Princess" Rich chidded with a joy he hardly felt in him but it made Jane smile and roll her eyes.

"Thank you.. You guys" Jane said.

"Don't mention it" Rich responded and with that they walked out leaving there blessing and prayers with Jane and Weller.

"Can I get you anything?"

"I'm a bit hungry"

"Ahh! I'll page the nurse" Kurt arrange some food to be sent to their room.

Jane has been a bit quiet since she came back from the last round of testing since her seizure. Kurt has been trying to keep the mood lighter and not mention anything Dr. Roga mentioned about the last stages of zip poisoning. Though Kurt knew Jane well enough to know she is starting to put two and two together on her own.

Kurt was shuffling through his mind try to find a topic to lighten the mood. Though it was hard. If they could not find the stem cells… if they could not synthesis the cure… Odds are stacking up against the one person he could not imagine his live without.

"I'm scare Kurt..."

He closed the little distance he had with his wife and nuzzled her neck. He wanted to tell her it's going to be okay. He wanted to tell that they are going to win this. Though truth of the matter was he was too scared himself. He didn't trust too many words to break through his lips without ripping open the floodgates that barely holding him in place. Instead he kissed her trying to sooth her until the words finally came to him.

"We are going to fight this Jane. We can do this." He said. Kurt could feel she was breathing harder now.

It's going to be okay. I'm going to be with you the whole time. We are going to figure this out together.. Okay…?

She was getting calmer.

"Okay…"

"I love you Kurt"

"I love you too Jane"

They held onto each other until the nurse appeared at the doorway with a cup of soup for her. Each drawing strength from each for an ordeal that is just beginning.


	2. Denial

They both tried their best to not to talk about anything remotely close to Jane's illness. Instead they both resort thinking of sunnier days in the future.

"Mountains or beaches" He asked.

"Hmm… I can use a beach right about now. I'm dying for some sun." She laughed even as she was saying it.

"Me too. I can use some sunshine"

"Florida or California" This time Jane asked.

"Tough one! I'd say Cali. What do you think?"

"I have to agree"

"Why California though?" Jane continued digging for answers.

"I don't know…" Jane raised her eyebrows egging him on to answer. He chuckled at her usual persistence.

"I guess.. Because you wanted to go there when… you know..." Jane tilted her head.

"Kurt… Where do YOU want to go?" Kurt smiled. He really did not prefer one over the other. His choice was which ever the one she would agree to. Their lives were too intertwined to pick apart each other's choices.

"California" He said it with so much surety to a point that Jane did not question it. Though needless to say, she knew what he was thinking.

"Do you think two weeks would be enough for us?" He asked.

"How about two months?"

"Two years!" Kurt topped her and they both laughed.

"I think we'll be missing running around in the field in two weeks though" Jane pointed out.

"Ya you are right. Okay two weeks it is!" Kurt finalized.

"We should rent a convertible and drive through the mountains to the Santa Monica beach." Kurt was getting keen deep into the planning phase.

"Yes! Have you done it before?" Jane was curious.

"No.. but I always wanted to" He smiled.

"Drive through the mountains to Santa Monica is in the agenda!" Jane announced.

"They have a ferris wheel in the pier right?"

"Yep they do!"

"I want to ride it!"

"Yes my love!"

"Long walks on the beach" Kurt said jokingly and they both laughed.

"Watching the sunset…" She smiled though Kurt could see that she was believing every single word of their plan.

"A LOT OF TIME DOING NOTHING" Kurt said

"Doing nothing?" Jane asked accusingly. She was hoping for more adventure. The kind that does not require them to leave their hotel bed.

"Well… not nothing… You know the kind that require us to stay at our hotel room or else we would get locked up for public indecency"

Jane laughed at that. Kurt and his rules.

They passed few hours planning their vacation for a sunnier days though the clouds had never left their doorstep. They both refused to admit it. They were scared.


	3. Mindless Fire

Vacation planning not only put both of them in a better mood but it also wore Jane out. She closed her eyes for a few seconds and before long, she was fast to sleep. Kurt also took the opportunity to catch some shut eye. Though their peace did not last nearly as long as they wished.

Kurt awoke startled by the blaring set of alarms from Jane's assortment of monitors. She was thrashing violently and her eyes were rolled back. She was having another seizure. Kurt quickly pulled her on to her side and try to hold her so that he won't bite her tough or hit her limbs somewhere all the while paging the nurse for help. This terrifying episode lasted a lot longer than the last one. Nurse also appeared on corner of his eyes. After what felt like an eternity, Jane finally slumped heavy back on to the bed.

Hey… are you with me? Jane?

Nurse took over the scene and started checking her vitals and try to get her to respond.

It was clear this episode of the seizures hit her even harder than the last. Her eye were still darting back and forth trying to assess the situation. He could also see she was laboring her breathing much much more compared to before.

After dust settle on the incident, nurse pulled Kurt aside.

We need to run some tests Agent Weller. So I'm going to take her for an MRI and blood work. I'll bring her back in a little bit.

With that nurse took Jane away from him and Kurt's desperation reached a new peak.

Kurt mindlessly started dialing Patterson again.

"Patterson, please tell me you have something"

"We are sort of following a lead" Truth was she did not want to get his hopes up or led alone tell a desperate man that they are looking for a mysterious book of secrets.

"What do you mean sort of following a lead!" Patterson can hear the frustration in his voice and immediately regretted her choice of words before.

"We found a man who MAY have what we need."

"How much is he asking for the stem cells?" Kurt would be willing to sell his soul for them

"We are trying to figure that out. He us to crack this code…" Patterson was trying her best to be vague.

"Patterson!" Deep down Kurt Weller knew full well they are doing everything but he couldn't help it. He was sitting next to his dying wife helpless to do anything but to watch her eyes slowly grow dimmer.

"I know I know. You know we are doing everything we can. Tell me how's Jane doing"

"She had another seizure"

"Is she okay?"

"They took her to get some tests. This one was a lot longer than the last"

"We are moving as fast as we can"

"What is he asking for it? Money? I can figure out a loan on our house"

"No, he's not after money. He want us to find this artifact. We are trying to track it down" Patterson hoped artifact would be a better choice of words than Book of Secrets.

"Artifact? Is there anything I can get you to help move things along faster. Please… whatever it is I'm willing to do it" Kurt practically begged. She knew he would go to the end of the world and back for Jane. She was as much helpless as she was.

"You know I will. Keep an eye on Jane. Make sure she stays strong. We got this." Patterson wish she could offer more but she didn't have much to offer herself.

Kurt Weller wanted more. Much much more, but for now he had to settle for a small glimmer of hope.


	4. Water

Nurse brought Jane back into the room. She was looking much better than the state she left the room in but clearly a lot more deteriorated compared to how she was just few hours ago.

"Hey baby how are you feeling" Kurt only delayed the question long enough for Jane to settle into the bed again.

"I'm okay... " She sought out Kurt's hand and he quickly caught it and kissed the top of her hand as he settle back on to the chair besides the bed that he occupied all along.

"Can I get you anything"

"No, I'm good. Did you eat anything? I didn't hear you even drinking a sip of water"

Kurt chuckled. "So… I should drink more water ah?"

"Yes you should" Jane attempted a smile. They were attempting to keep the mood light on a situation that had no humor.

"Kurt, you have to take care of yourself"

"Well… why should I? I have a lovely wife who take very good care of me, and even remind me to drink water"

"You know there are apps now a days to remind you to drink water"

"Ahhh but none of them are this feisty!" They both laughed at that.

Kurt could see that talking seemed take a lot more effort out of Jane so he resort to do more of the talking.

"Are you getting a bit sleepy already?" Kurt wanted to make sure she is not straining herself too much.

"Little-bit"

"Try to get some sleep. I'll be right here"

"You should go get something there is even a vending machine down the hall"

"I will. Try to get some rest"

"I love you Kurt" Tears escaped his eyes without his permission.

"I love you too Jane" With that Jane drifted off to sleep rather quickly. Kurt was left holding her hand in his.

Little that Kurt Weller knew at the time, those were the few last words he would hear Jane utter out loud to him. She was drifting between sleep and unconsciousness. Doctor insisted it would be best to put her on life support. Kurt signed the paperwork for it.

It was not fair he though. Why does it has to be his Jane that goes through this nightmare. The woman that finally had a moment of peace from a life filled with nightmares. Isn't she allowed to have some happiness. Isn't he allowed some happiness?

Kurt walked out the hospital room into another small room that also functioned as the hospital's church and a spiritual sanctuary. First time in a long time he sat on a one of benches staring at the a statue of Christ and ask for one thing he needed the most. He had done this before. He told him. It was when Taylor was taken. Though this time he would not take no for an answer. He told god how wonderful person Jane really is. How world is a better place with her, and how she deserves much more life to save a lot more people. He told god how they first met. The scared girl who was looking to him for answers he could not give. How she marched in front of them insisting that she have to go to field with the team. It almost made him chuckle. He thought of the day they first gave in and said the words, "I love you" they both have been holding for so long. The moments of utter joy and surprise when he popped the question. Their wedding day, and the moments after their wedding day. Enormous number of takeout meals and their ever improving vegan menu. Jane Doe was not done, he told god.

With that he walked out of the makeshift church and to the vending machine down the hall. He bought a bottle of water and took a sip. Just then, his phone dinged and the message said,

"We got the stem cells and we are on our way to synthesis the cure"

He smiled at himself and took another sip of water. He marched back toward Jane's room, sat of his usual chair and took her hand in his. He ignored the machines that huffed and puffed around her. He started telling her that she need to fight a little bit longer and Patterson and Rich found got the cells. Though most importantly he told her he even bought a bottle of water and took a big gulp of it from the bottle in front of her.

"My love… now when this bottle run out, you have to remind me to go get another!"


End file.
